BIG FIRST

It may be Saturday, but I'm joining my fellow bloggers at Five Minute Friday.

This week's prompt is FIRST.

I was busy living my BIG FIRST yesterday 

so I had to wait to write about it until today.

Yesterday was fully loaded with resistance.

1) Firstborn pre-teen push back on every word out of my mouth
2) Youngest needed snack for entire class (I put a reminder in my phone but forgot anyway)
3) I didn't get ready for the day because of tangling with #1 and had a full day that required being put together.
4) I zip kids to school, go to store to get snack, zip home get put together as best I can, back to school for youngest's juggling performance.
5) Attend performance, video and clap.
6) Carefully navigating slushy snow and ice, I wipe out on the sidewalk going back to my car crashing on my knee that I wrecked last year skiing.
7) I have to go home and change clothes because I am now soaking wet.
8) I desperately want to cancel the rest of the day because of the mental exhaustion I feel already AND my knee hurts pretty bad.
9) Go home, change clothes, put on less slippery soled boots deciding for the FIRST time on a day like this that I am going to Live Courageous despite the desire to throw in the towel!

10) I make it to my first appointment and dial in to the  project/discussion we decided to tackle.
11) I drive to my next appointment, making it on time and enjoyed the time with a great friend.
12) I zipped over to the school because one of the boys needed money for something.
13) I'm seriously thinking I'm nuts to keep going with my knee rapidly swelling and my head beginning to pound.
14) I have to go home to get the paperwork for my next appointment because I forgot it earlier.
15) I am 5 minutes late to my next appointment but she was gracious and prayed for my headache and knee injury. By the time I left my head did not hurt. Until...
16) I'm avoiding ice on the steps and crack my head into a light fixture.
17) I miss dinner and head out to my class for the evening.
18) After class I grocery shop and I trip on my way in the house carrying a bag of groceries.
19) My husband grabs the rest of the groceries expressing concern for my knee.
20) I climb into bed thankful that I managed to push through, accomplish and even thrive pushing through a crazy hard bunch of events that could have sidelined me for the whole day.

Seriously, I had to choose to Live Courageous many times when all I wanted to do was curl up and quit. This was a BIG FIRST for me. BUT:

Being with the people, doing what I planned to do was worth fighting for yesterday.

It was worth it. ALL of it.

WHEN Do We Live Courageous?

This will be a multi-part blog --- There are so many WHENs to live courageous.


As I battle the clinical depression tempting me to circle the drain in my thoughts, I post this for anyone who even has the slightest desire to Live Courageous! or knows they need to, somehow, some way.

I have been on the hunt for a bathing suit. It is a challenge. My body has morphed so much in the last year and a half since I had gastric sleeve surgery many things just fit weird, or in my opinion look weird.

Finding one in January, another challenge. I found 3, full price, no coupon, no sale in sight… and two sizes smaller than I’ve worn in 20 years.

Sigh… I decided to try them on anyway. I wasn’t looking for a self-esteem boost anyway, right?

The first one I tried on fit. Everywhere. Huh? Cool.

The second one - not awesome but functional.

The third one – liked the style but no.stinkin.way.


I sat in the dressing room, tears rolling down my face. My body fits in a smaller size suit than I have worn for over 20 years but my focus was on how far I still have to go.

Do you ever rob yourself of the current blessing to look at the seemingly endless distance ahead?

That is WHEN to LIVE COURAGEOUS!

SEE the blessing. Hold it. Celebrate it. Rest in it. Even for a moment. Then…

Keep moving forward. Every.single.day.

Yes, I'm a Dallas Cowboys fan, don't judge, it's been a rough year.

 

Today I swam, in that suit, roughly 40 minutes and approximately 1300 meters. I am training for a Half-Ironman in June of this year. This suit is going to help me meet the goal of crossing the finish line!

  

Live Courageous! It's worth it.

 

 

Why Live Courageous?

I Live Courageous! because

Two years ago, December 2013 I wrote THIS.

And to break out from that horrible place, one of the things I did was THIS.

Then I decided to learn to ski. 

COURAGE.

My first ski instructor had one leg. "Lefty". 

But then:
December 26, 2014 I wrecked my knee. I was practicing before my second ski lesson with my Love on the beginner hill. I fell and heard a pop. I assumed since I was over 40 my body would make noises when I was learning a new skill. I got up, fell, got up, crashed, got up, slid down the hill and decided to take the lift to the top and try some more. I fell down again. And again. This time he said it didn't even look like I was trying to stay upright. Turns out, I didn't have a ligament to stand on (I didn't know that yet). I kept at it until I hurt too bad to clip into my skis anymore.

Several weeks of crutches (while my Love had to travel for work), tests, evaluations, and an MRI, I had someone else's Achilles tendon (I am grateful for those who donate their parts when they don't need them anymore.) installed as my new anterior cruciate ligament (ACL). It was a major endeavor and required many hours, weeks, months of pain, stretching, physical therapy, etc. It essentially took over my entire life and I already had a busy one!

EVERY YEAR is going to require some amount of COURAGE. 

A few big things required me to Live Courageous! in 2015:


I worked hard to rehab my knee, including admitting I needed to do something to control my downward spiral into another bout of depression due to spending the winter on my butt and on crutches. Once you go into remission in clinical depression, it is extremely hard to admit you are sliding back into the hole. 

COURAGE.

I walked with my best friend through a breast cancer diagnosis, double mastectomy, reconstruction surgery, a new relationship, proposal and marriage. Keeping my head (and encouraging them even when I was afraid she would lose her life) focused on God and His provision for that season. 

COURAGE.

I did my fifth sprint triathlon - these pictures - posting them.

COURAGE. 

Best swim time ever.

Headed out on the bike ride.

About to cross the finish line!

And finally, I quit my job at a place I love with people I love to start a career doing what I love - COACH! 

COURAGE.


In 2016 I know COURAGE will be required of me to do these things: 

• Building a business actively cheering you to Live Courageous!
• Remaining transparent and professional - a delicate balance for me
• Training and Finishing the Half Ironman Coeur d'Alene June 26, 2016
• And... only God knows what else... 

I Live Courageous! because I want to squeeze every drop out of life. I've survived feeling stuck and I never want to feel that way again. 

Now it's your turn. 

Do you want to Live Courageous! ? 

What Courageous plans do you have for 2016?

Please answer one or more of these questions in the comments below. I'd love to hear from you!

Can I help you Live Courageous! ? Don't hesitate to email me  if you would like a free 30 minute consultation. My introduction rates will expire at midnight (PST) on January 1, 2016. I can Skype anywhere in the world, so don't let location put you off of moving forward.