Flexibility is KEY to Live Courageous!

When the word "Flexibility" came to mind as my focus for 2016 I had no clue what it might look like in the day - to - day reality. I am not, by nature (and nurture) a structured planner but I do like to have order and systems in place.

Until it becomes impossible to keep the order and run the systems. 

I spent 74 days with a migraine. On day 75, I woke up without one. It felt amazing. Like someone broke me out of jail and I could run free - but not very far. The migraine leveled my plans for the year. It forced changes in my life I didn't' know were needed and provided a re-alignment opportunity.

I had to wade in slowly to the water of my life, living more by an outline than a script. 

I used to believe my life needed more and more structure in order to be successful and achieve my goals. I mapped out my days with chunks of time allotted for each focus and tried to keep "on track". This amplified my anxiety and super-powered my stress. I discovered I was trying to make my round peg fit in a square hole (life by script). 

Living by outline means creating a framework of focus and choosing to find peace in the details. Flexibility as a lifestyle, instead of something forced by circumstance takes a crazy amount of courage (at least for me).

I love wisteria. It is a great example of what I'm talking about. The framework is the fence and the vine grows. It requires pruning (as do I) but its a messy kind of beautiful, like my life. I show up to grow, trust the process, thankful to adapt, and be fully present in the moment.

Now I am swimming strong, moving through the water of my life, establishing a new rhythm knowing flexibility is KEY to Live Courageous! 

Over My Head

For 38 days I have been dealing with a non-stop migraine. I've taken advice, been to ERs, spent the night in the hospital, shots in the butt, had full workups on my heart and head, natural medicine, acupuncture, chiropractic, massage, exercise, spiritual, psychiatric, emotional, you name it, I've done it. I still have another month to wait to see the headache specialist neurologist (yes, I'm on the cancellation list).

I couldn't see how my current situation reflected anything "courageous".
But then it occurred to me that sharing this might be:

Who I am -- Tenacious courageous woman hanging by the frayed end of the knot of my cope rope.
What I'm walking through --- Constant pain affecting every aspect of my ability to function
When - Every.single.day.
Where I am -- Desperately missing my life
Why - No one has ANY idea. There are literally thousands of thoughts, opinions and possibilities. I've heard most of them. It's too much. It will be figured out when it is. I'm working every angle and possibility that I have energy for at any given moment.

HOW am I going to deal with this?
Push through the pain.
Push away the pain medicine.
Push into hope.
Receive the help I've been given.
Receive the love provided for me.
Receive the purpose of this experience for strengthening not destruction.

To Live Courageous! is to NOT GIVE UP. To make a plan. To believe nothing awful lasts forever and even the good stuff may pass, but it will come again.

And to know that just because there is a setback, that doesn't mean you can't come back stronger, faster, smarter and better than you ever have been. I'm counting on it.

Live Courageous! means MOVE FORWARD

Over my head in migraine pain, longing, begging for answers, craving some sort of “normalcy” to return. What does courage look like in moments like these? I’m not exactly sure for every day, but for today I think it looks like:

Sticking with my super clean protein shake, coffee, water, chamomile tea, listening to a sermon preached by a friend, worship sent by another, advice from another, praying for others in deeper challenges than I am, and writing.

I am supposed to be training for the Half Ironman just a little over four months away and I still have yet to get a solid week of training in. Sick kids, sinus and ear infections, migraines, travel, you name it, it’s encroached upon my plans to meet this goal I’ve had for four years. Many don’t believe I can do it. Several want me to but aren't sure I can finish. Some are convinced I can do it, even this late in the training season. Others don’t want me to try. 

I choose to MOVE FORWARD. Because that is what I firmly believe changes things.
MOVE FORWARD.

I share all this with you, so you know, that when I choose to LIVE COURAGEOUS! it’s not because it’s easy for me either.

Find one way you can MOVE FORWARD today and list it in the comments below. I will cheer you on!

Blessings and love!
Jenn